Greetings to all from Bob!

Yesterday afternoon I saw a Dr. Young. She's part of the team of doctors with Dr. Clark and Dr. Keefer. Things are happening now.

1. They did another CT scan on me yesterday and measured me for additional radiation treatments that will include the 8th rib right posterior and the pelvic. They will start the new radiation treatments on Wednesday.
2. The Chemo therapy company called me on Friday and they are shipping my Revlimid (chemo oral medication) to the house Tuesday by special courier. That medication is supposed to arrive by 8:30 AM today. I will then call the oncologists office to get dosing procedures. Nothing has ever made me sick, but I am told that if any medication will make one sick, it will be this one.
3. I took my 3rd steroid pack on Saturday AM. I've mentioned that the steroids tend to make me jittery and I get mouthy with Debbie. But she understands and although she doesn't let me get away with murder, she is very sweet about it all. Have I mentioned lately how much I love Debbie and how much I appreciate her willingness to stand by me in these really trying times.

The Doctor seems to think I'm right on schedule. She says everything looks good and she's proud of my recovery to date.

Before I stop today, I need to add two personal notes. The first is of concern for any and everyone who reads this blog site. If you engage in self destructive behaviors, please consider a lifestyle change. I have been obese most all of my life, and although I am told that nothing I did or could not have done could have caused or side-stepped this cancer, I really sort of believe maybe I could have done some things to lessen the possibility. However, that is neither here, nor there. But, my concern right here, right now today is for those of you who may do things that have certainly been linked to cancer in one form or another, please, please consider alternatives.

And I also want to say "see you later" to Mike, my friend from church who won his battle over cancer last Saturday morning when he went home to live with God. In Mike, I saw God's gentle grace and peace. I would sure like to think that he had his moments that he would melt-down like I do. But he had a heart for God and a quiet, gentle spirit that was kind and caring. I'll miss Mike. Mike had Mesothelioma which is a "lion" in comparison to the Multiple Myeloma"mouse" I have, but I was looking forward to comparing notes with him, at least for a while. I had stayed away because I get so emotional, and I didn't want to upset him. Now, he's gone... but he is still there for me. So, "I'll see you later, Mike. Thanks for the stuff you did teach me. Ask God to give some doctor some place the brains and guts to find a cure for this stuff."

Grace & Peace to All...

Bob Utley

Treatments Going Well

On Tuesday I started my radiation treatments. They are painless, except for the position they put me in. I lay on my back on a hard table (that is not quite wide enough) and I put both hands above my head and grasp two little "bicycle handles bars" and hang on. The big machine circles my body and makes little wheezing noises. Then the machine drops below my body and they treat me from below, too... I guess. I don't know what they are doing with me. They could be blowing "fufu dust" on me for all I know.

Next Monday afternoon they will re-measure me which means that they will do a new CT scan on me. I've had pain in my spine, 8th rib (lower right), pelvic, and shoulder. They want to pin-point these areas so they can begin treating them with radiation as well. I do know that Dr. Clark (radiology oncologist) did NOT intend to zap the pelvic, rib, etc. and he planned to let the other treatments address them. But then, I started having pain so he will nuke them for a faster recovery.

If you'll recall, a week or so ago I picked a few random words that were on my heart. Today, I'm going to do the same thing. Today, my word is Blessing.

It would be impossible to account for all the outpouring of concern and love we have received during these last several weeks. People bring food, still send cards, and call on the phone to see what we need. Folks in my office have offered to help me by taking some of my duties to help alleviate any stress I have. I can't begin to say how "blessed" it is to be the recipient of so many blessings.

God continues to look after me. He continues to make things happened for me and I am very grateful. The Chemotherapy medication has been approved, the radiation is going well, I'm not having any major reaction to the steroids (other than they play games with my depression) and the insurance company has already approved me for the stem cell transplants.

Continue to pray for my body to respond to treatments.

Grace & Peace to all

Bob "Robert" Utley

Workin' 9 to 5...

Dad went back to work today! (It was more like 9:30 - 2:30 NOT 9 - 5!) He did good and was glad to be back.

He has his first radiation treatment is tomorrow, and he will go M-F, each day for 3 weeks. The chemo pill is still in the works (insurance approval is a hassle.)

Please pray that tomorrow goes well. Pray that the chemo approval goes through. Pray for my mom's health and strength. Pray for dad, and let him see how his strength and faith are encouraging SO many others.

God is good all the time!

Update from Bob on Wednesday...

Greetings to Friends and Family;

Today has been a good day! I’ve felt pretty good, although I didn’t sleep very well last night. I’ve been in the doctor’s offices every day this week and tomorrow will be a one day reprieve and I’ll be back at the hospital on Friday for another test.

On Monday 10-13 I saw Dr. Doug Clark. He is the radiology oncologist. He had them prep me for my first radiation treatments. I’ll have my first treatment on Tuesday afternoon (10-21-08) at 3:45 PM. Then, I’ll have one every day for about a month. I think I’ll just consume my food raw, and then let the radiation cook it and me at the same time. J

Yesterday, Tuesday 10-14 I had my follow up appointment with my neuro-surgeon, Dr. Ben White. He was very excited to see me getting around as well as I was. He really did believe that I would most likely be paralyzed from the tumor pressing against my spinal cord and from the surgical procedure. Even though I walk with a walker, he is delighted that I can get around as well as I can. I really don’t believe I understood how concerned he was. Debbie tells me that she and Karyn understood the gravity of my situation, but I didn’t.

Today, I just went and got a flu shot. Rumor has it that I will be a two flu-shot per year person from now on. The Chemotherapy and radiation will compromise my immune system, and being a diabetic, I will have to stay on top of the flu vaccines.

Tomorrow, Thursday 10-16, Debbie and I will drive down to McAlester to see our parents. Debbie is off for fall break and I asked my doctor if I could accompany her and he agreed that I could go. I’m excited to get to go.

Friday, 10-17 I’ll have a PET scan. I understand it is a more exact scan and will help them know exactly where I will get my radiation treatments and chemo treatments.

I want to thank you again for praying for us. God is taking good care of me and Debbie… but we certainly need your encouragement and prayers.

Grace & Peace to all!

Bob Utley

Schedule

Today dad went and met with the radiologist, Dr. Clark (we will have a test at some point, so I hope you're remembering all these names!)

This is the current schedule:

• Chemo pill, one pill a day for 21 days and then off for 7. (Those might start this week or next.)
• The first radiation treatment will start next Tuesday at 3:45 PM. He has been "tattooed" to mark the affected areas, and the radiation will target those areas.
• He's already on steroids to "shrink" the tumors as well.
• He meets with the surgeon Dr. White tomorrow for a check up.
• He also will have the PET scan (I think Friday) to make sure there are not other spots.

I know dad has asked that everyone pray for his body to accept the treatment, I also want to add that he will not have ill side effects from the medications/radiation. You hear of some people being nauseous, sick and tired, and then others have no complications! I am asking for NO (or few) complications!!

Thank you for your prayers!

God is SO good!

One Month Later

Dear Friends and Family,

Today is Saturday, October 11, 2008. The surgery to remove the affected vertebra in my back happened 1 month ago today. And today I took my first round of steroid medications to combat the cancer in my body. The chemotherapy medication is on order and should be here this week and I will start it as soon as it arrives. I am happy that we are doing things to fight the disease, instead of just waiting for things to happen.

I’ve been able to get out and around some. I drove myself to the doctor’s office on Thursday and to get a hair cut on Friday. Also, last night I drove to church to attend our Celebrate Recovery program. Driving is a little daunting because it has been over a month since I have driven at all. But, I did just fine. I’m very cautious and I stay on “all point lookout” the entire time I’m behind the wheel. And, for those who might wonder, no… I don’t use the cell phone while driving.

I mentioned being at Celebrate Recovery last night. This is the program that has helped me with my chronic depression. Since it has been a month since I was able to go, I just had to attend. It was wonderful getting to see friends and recovery siblings. My random word for today is a word that was used last night. The word is “Grace”.

I cannot even write for the tears streaming my face. God’s grace has been lavished on us beyond description. We’ve seen his miracles over and over, and we have enjoyed his grace like never before. There is no way I can list them all, but here are just a few of God’s gifts of grace that we have received.

1. Dr. White (the neurosurgeon) typically does not see patients on Friday, but the week I needed to see him (back in early September), he had some open time on that Friday, and I just happened to be the one who got to see him. GRACE!
2. I learned yesterday that my chemotherapy medication is covered by my insurance. A 4-month supply of my chemo medication would equal the cost of a brand new Buick. My co-pay is $45 for each of those 4 months. GRACE!
3. I have had some pain associated with the surgery, but nothing like the pain I endured before the surgery. GRACE!
4. Debbie’s mother has been able to maintain her strength… and actually improve some. We believe God knows I need Debbie here with me. GRACE!
5. Although I have had some sad moments, and there are times my depression chews on me, I’ve been able to keep a fairly good energy and spirit. GRACE!
6. My cancer is treatable and the prognosis is very good at this point. GRACE!

I continue to count the gifts of God’s grace because I need to know – I need to see, feel, and hear how God is helping me and how he is reaching out to me every day.

Grace – It is free to all, no one deserves it, but everyone receives it. Even in the very darkest of storms, God’s grace is there. I am encouraging you… and you encourage me to remember that all we have to do is reach out and take it.
–Bob Utley

Thursday Update

Greetings To All:

I'm just going to make this brief. I want to let you know that things are starting to happen. Continue to pray for me in that my body will react to the medication positively, but also, pray for the doctors who are (and will) treat me.

First, I will see Dr. Doug Clark on Monday, 10-13. He is a radiation oncologist. He is the one Dr. Keefer has asked to evaluate me for the radiation on my spine and other tumors. Then, on Tuesday, I'll have a follow-up appointment with Dr. Ben White, my neurosurgeon. I think he'll be pleasantly surprised that I have healed as much as I have, and that I really don't have a great deal of pain. I have spoken to Dr. Keefer on the phone a few times this week and he is still trying to get my insurance company to approve the PET scan that he has requested. He wants me to start the chemo and steroid therapy as soon as possible. But he wants a PET scan before we start.

I plan to ask the surgeon to release me to work partial days for a few weeks and then hopefully go back to work full time on 1-11. I know I'll miss work periodically due to treatments, and etc. But, I just have to go back to work. Part of my desire to go back to work is to get me out of this house! I'm getting more claustrophobic as time goes by. I have to get back around people. It helps pull the focus off of me and I can focus on tasks at hand.

I apologize for the use of the "Random Words" but that seems to be the way my mind operates. Today's Random Word is: ADJUSTMENT

I am having to make lots of adjustments in my life. I've not driven a car in over a month so my independence has been compromised and I have had to adjust to that. I have been a right-side sleeper all my life. Now, with the steel rods in my spine, I am having to adjust to sleeping on my back. I am having to adjust to forcing myself to eat substantial food. I'd do fine with bran flakes, ham and cheese on whole wheat, and Campbell's low sodium soup, but I also know I need real food to help my body heal. Also, I am adjusting to the fact that I don't have the energy I did when I was younger... (ok. I don't even have the energy I did 6 months ago.) I'm having to adjust to the fact that I fatigue really quick.

So, I'm adjusting. I have a pretty good attitude, but I would be lying if I said I didn't have moments when I get sad or upset. When I get the "blues" I try to remind myself to recall the first four lines of a famous prayer... "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." It helps me get through the tough times.

Continue to pray for me and for Debbie. With looking out after me, teaching full time, and concern for her own mother who is in the hospital in McAlester, Debbie's dance card is pretty full.

Thank you in advance for your prayers.

Bob

Another Note from Bob....

I think I am just going to turn the blogging over to him, he's much better at it than me. ; )



Dear Family and Friends;

Some random words have been floating in my head today. So, I will just write what is on my heart.

HOPE: My oncologist called me today to discuss some treatment options. They are getting the induction set up and he thinks we can get treatment started by next week. He also said that my stem cell transplants will have to be in Tulsa at St. Francis (apparently that is where my HMO requires them done.) So, in a few months, I’ll have to be in Tulsa for 3 or 4 weeks. Of course all of this can change “in the twinkling of an eye”, as the Good Book says.

LIMITATION: I was in surgery for 8 hours and took 9 units of blood, so I ended up a little anemic. I tire pretty fast, but I know I’m getting stronger all the time. I try not to sleep for long periods during the day because if I do I don’t sleep well at night. Today I have been trying to do work-type activities in hopes that I can begin the process of getting back to work sooner than later. However, I know my limitations and I can’t afford to get too tired or in too much pain.

KINDNESS: I have run completely out of sick leave and will deplete all my vacation time pretty fast. I have many co-workers who have offered to give me leave, which will certainly help. Folks from our Bible class at church and the staff at Debbie’s school have been generous to bring food and have offered to provide even more. It is humbling to recognize the fact that people care as much as they do and are willing to help.

I am going to stop here. We still request your thoughts and prayers. And, we still believe in specific prayers. So here is the short list of prayer requests:
1. That our insurance company will work with us in treatment.
2. That when the treatments start that my body will respond to the treatment.
3. That Debbie can keep up with the demands of looking after me, teaching, and going to McAlester when she can to go see her mother who is in the hospital there.
(And if you know me at all you will know this is the craziest prayer request to date!)
4. That I can regain an appetite to substantial foods that can help my body heal. I just don’t feel like eating much, and without the proper nutrients I can’t get my strength back.

Grace & Peace to all… More when I can muster the energy.

-Bob

From Bob...

Dad sent this email out a few days ago, and he says things a lot better than I do! I thought I should share....



10/2/08

Brothers and Sisters -


This afternoon Debbie and I went to talk to Dr. Keefer, the oncologist. As many of our class members can attest hearing the word "cancer" in any context is a shock. But still, Dr. Keefer says the plasmacytoma is "highly treatable", and the bone marrow scan only shows 15% of the damaging cells from the 100% possible. The only tumors (lesions) they could see was one on the 8th rib, upper spine, and one right in the top of my head. The one on my head is positioned perfectly that if I were a Christmas tree ornament, it would be exactly where the little wire doo-dad goes. :-)

So, where do we go from here? Dr. Keefer has ordered a new round of blood work and a PET scan. Once he gets all of this new evidence with the old evidence, he'll have a clearer picture of what to do.

Now the choices - I asked about MD Anderson. I explained I didn't want to shoot a gnat with a howitzer but I wanted to get the best treatment possible. I asked him what he would do. He said the leading multiple myeloma docs in the US were in Little Rock, and he could refer me. I asked if we could start the treatment here and watch it for 30-60-90 days and if the treatment did not look like it was progressing successfully, then go to Little Rock. He said that would certainly be fine.

I plan to start the treatment here as soon as Dr. Keefer is ready. All of my support systems (family, spiritual, and medical) are already in place. To go to Little Rock for even a few weeks will impede my progress. I believe I’m doing what God wants me to do. Since all of this began, I have spoken my absolute trust in God, and we have prayed for the doctors to do all they can do for us. God has blessed us with 100% care so far, and I don’t see anything that makes me think he will not bless us as we continue in this path.

Love you--- Robert "Bob" Utley

Oncologist Update

Dad met with the oncologist yesterday. They found one more small spot on his skull. The plan is he will do a PET scan in the next week. Once that is done he will start chemo/radiation/and steroids. After a few months he can head to Little Rock (if he wants to, and if he isn't getting the results he is wanting.) Little Rock apparently is the multi-myloma (spelling??) capital of the world and they have many specialist, etc in that area.

We are praying that all the treatments remove the cancer completely!

Who's good? GOD is good!